It’s been a year since I last saw my boyfriend and it sucks

A couple of days ago, I was checking out the calendar to see if I have any pending deadlines for the week. Then, I realized that 1) June is about to end and 2) it’s almost a year since I last saw my boyfriend in person.

Fun fact: I’ve been in a long-distance relationship with my boyfriend for three years now. (Wow, it’s been that long already?) He decided long ago that he’d rather work abroad so he’s closer to his family. I don’t blame him.

Last July, he came home and it was the first time I saw him since he left the country in 2015. I was ecstatic mostly because he was here for my birthday month. However, it also felt like his stay was too short—one minute I was meeting up with him daily and the next, I was already dropping him off at the airport.

Now we’re back to square one: not knowing when exactly he’ll be back and just communicating on Telegram 24/7. Seeing that July is approaching so quickly is making me a bit emotional, TBH.

Many have asked me how I manage to deal with LDR and I would answer, “I don’t know. We just make it work.” It’s true and we’re not hiding the fact that it’s difficult to be apart from each other. Contrary to what some movies and social media influencers would portray, this type of relationship isn’t easy. There are no visitation trips every six months and our work schedules make it impossible to video chat daily—sometimes even messaging when things get hectic. It’s literally a test of patience and loyalty, as well as saving a lot just in case we plan out something big in the future.

Then again, if you asked my teenage self about this, I would’ve said outright that I’ll break it off. Believe it or not, I was sooo against the concept of LDR back then. It really changes your perspective when you’re in that position already.

But for me, the good parts outweigh the bad, and I’ve also learned to not rely on him to do sh*t for me. I can pay for my own dinner, buy concert tickets, and just have fun without needing a plus-one. It also taught me to value communication of any form—not just with him, but also my friends who I talk to every day as well.

It might take another year or more before I get to see my boyfriend again. There’s no guarantee that I won’t feel something once my birthday month comes along. But hey, if I survived the last three years, what’s another month without him, right? Time moves so quickly now and I’m sure he’ll be back soon.


Art by Marian Hukom

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