When people say “dress appropriately” or “dress your age,” eyebrows go up as it often implies a double standard imposed on women on how they should look. It also glorifies how women are prized in their youth but are placed in a certain category as they age. Stacy takes this laughable stereotype and puts it on its head. On the subject of a pink cotton halter dress she still loves to wear, she digresses: “For me, that dress simply reinforces that I may not act my age, but I can’t avoid aging. I can make choices that allow me connections with people younger than myself, but I am no longer young.”
It’s a fresh take on how we meet the expectations of society. Simply put with Stacy, we shouldn’t. But we must be more aware of who we are. She talked about Leslie Mann as an example when Leslie was turned down at a club because she was too old even though her sexy dress was party-worthy. Stacy writes, “…she was also taking on the style of a younger woman, dressing in a way that no longer aligned with the person she had become.”
In that sense, style is an evolution. From trendy and frivolous, it’s all about owning up to the person you found among the experiments with nylon and mesh. “Frilly, girl clothes don’t have enough gravitas for me. I like suits and leather and jumpsuits, and I almost exclusively wear pants. I am pretty sure this change in my style happened quite naturally.”
“What’s so bad about growing older when it’s revered in almost every society except ours?” she continues to write. Which means she doesn’t subscribe to how a woman should always look young. “The traditional colors and styles and actual ‘femininity’ associated with a woman’s wardrobe feel as antiquated as the ideas that you can’t be an accomplished woman without marriage or children.”
She goes on to talk about how really, the expectations society puts on women is changing. It’s not just about getting married and having kids. “Having it all” means doing whatever you want at whatever age you want. Stacy says, “At 47, I’m finding my trouser pockets are filled with fewer and fewer f*cks.”
So what you should do, how you should dress, and what you want in life should be all up to you. No matter how many birthday candles you’re blowing out.